Well, Hello There, 2011!

Saturday, January 1st--We had a WONDERFUL New Years Eve!! I say it over and over again but I don't care, we have amazing neighbors that we consider very close friends. For the last 4 years we've gotten together on New Years Eve to ring in the New Year together. It's always fun, never a dull moment! We play games, overstuff ourselves on a huge variety of delicious food, laugh till it hurts and just plain enjoy each others company. We were introduced to the XBox 360 Kinect at the Alonzo's house. WOW!!!! So awesome! And yes, I am officially jealous! Some of the guys had fun in Tony's room of musical instruments and tried to coordinate a song together. Uh, ahem.....at least they tried! ha ha ha Anyhoo, it was a great evening and I got to welcome in 2011 with a sweet kiss from my amazing husband and big hugs from my precious kids. Not to mention, being surrounded by dear friends we love and truly appreciate.

(I think this will be a long post but I'm feeling a lot of things right now. Ultimately, this is our family journal and, in some ways, my personal journal.)

I didn't mention this experience in my previous Christmas-time posts because I was focused on our time in Washington. A few days before Christmas the weather in Northern Utah got a little crazy. I had asked my friend/neighbor, Kathy Alonzo, if she'd watch my house while we were gone and she was glad to. Little did she know what kind of commitment that would entail....neither did we! The day after we got to Washington, it snowed about a foot at our house. The next day it all melted and Northern Utah was hit with heavy rain too. For our cramped neighborhood this always means plenty of flooding, mostly in window wells. I prayed and prayed and prayed our wells would stay dry.....they didn't. My sweet friend, Kathy, and her daughters were draining one of the wells at 12:00 at night. When that one was drained she checked the rest to find that another was flooded and almost creeping into our basement. Finally, after 1:00 am, the water was drained and they were able to go to bed. My heart broke knowing they had to crawl down into those wells, in freezing water, so late at night, hauling heavy buckets of water and dumping them to save our house from flooding. Not only that, but they were up early in the morning to make sure the wells were still dry and, thank goodness, they were! The next day was bright and sunny, giving the flooded yards a chance to drain with no more flooded window wells. (HUGE sigh of relief!) Fortunately, there were no more scares like that while we were gone. I cried tears of joy and thankfulness to such a sweet family that sacrificed and saved our house from flooding and an expensive clean up. I'm also thankful to know there are others that are near and surround us that would have made the same sacrifice for us and they know we would do the same in return. We are truly blessed!

I've thought a lot about the things I want to accomplish in 2011. I've made goals, prayed for clarity and understanding of things and issues that are beyond my control. The first week of December was full of drama followed with a lot of anxiety. In the past, within a few days, I've usually calmed down and feel okay on my own. This time, there was never that calming, no matter what I tried, without medication. I ended up having no choice but to go to our family doctor and ask to be put on anxiety medication. After several tests and some bloodwork, he agreed I was in need. Going on medication was a decision I struggled over but I just wasn't handling problems well on my own. The medication works great. I only need it when I feel the beginnings of anxiety so it's not daily. There is a surprising "side-effect" to having to take anxiety medication.....enlightenment. Not a huge spiritual experience, just enlightening on some issues I've been struggling with. It's been a good thing as I make decisions and changes to improve my life and my family.

In the last few days a special movie, I love dearly, has been rolling through my head like crazy. One of my all-time favorite movies is called "Simon Birch" . If you haven't seen this movie then, wow, you should! It's hilarious in some places and cry-like-a-baby in other places. The main character is a kid with severe physical disabilities. He believes God sent him to earth with these disabilities and that God has huge plans for Simon. Over time Simon begins to doubt himself and eventually asks the local pastor if God has a plan for him. The pastor is not very helpful in answering his question but Simon gets his own answers all too soon. It is a beautiful movie and, I would think, most people walk away from this movie with goals to be a better person, better friend, more aware of things and people that should matter to them most. I would hope some walk away wondering what Gods plan is for them and take time to ponder that. As I've thought about this movie, the last few days, I've been thinking of that very thing--along with all the other lessons this movie offers. What is Gods plan for me? I know some of the answers but I know there's plenty more and I've got to work on finding those answers--seeking them out diligently with faith and humility. I've got to stop caring and worrying about things and people that have become or always were toxic to me and/or my family. The strength of a chain is based upon it's weakest link, the same applies to a family. I want to serve my family with love and happiness. I want to serve my neighbors and friends and be aware of their needs. I feel like I've lost touch in so many ways. I don't know what's going on with those around me and I feel bad about that. I sit in church and I don't seem to know half the people and we're one of the handful of families that has lived here the longest! I thought becoming an adult would help me to grow out of the awkwardness of meeting and getting to know new people, it hasn't. Another goal to work on this year? Yes, I think so.

One of my favorite quotes from "Simon Birch" is this:

"Time is a monster that cannot be reasoned with. It responds like a snail to our impatience, then it races like a gazelle when you can't catch a breath."

Whether time goes by slow or fast, and it's usually fast, then I've got to spend it wisely.

Happy New Year, 2011, to you all! May you have a wonderful year full of happiness and joy!